Sunday, August 15, 2010

Chicken Soup for the Emo Soul.

I woke up this morning and felt really depressed. I really hate how sometimes depression comes on and you can feel that it's entirely chemical. I attribute at least 90% of my depressive episodes to chemical/biological factors...I mean to say, that it's all internal and isn't caused by environment. When I woke up this morning I could actually "feel" the chemistry in my brain was slightly off balance...off kilter. Does this make sense? Am I explaining this well enough?
So...the depression sets in and then everything affects it. I just dropped my wife off at work and saw this guy that I absolutely despise. He works next door to my wife's place of employment. He's a shoe store employee. I've had a previous altercation with him involving "parking rights" in a private parking lot. He wanted me to move my car. I didn't want to move. He told me I had to move. I realized that: A.) I was leaving anyway B.) That I couldn't fight the guy with my 8 month old baby in the car 
SO! I moved the car whilst glaring and mimic'd the words "fuck you pussy" as I reversed the car. 
Anyway, I saw him today as my wife walked into work with her friend and he "checked out" my wife and her friend as they entered the building via the service entrance. It filled me with such rage! Such exquisite and pristine rage! And honestly...this guy...everyone would hate this guy if they met him. He is one of those rare individuals that contribute absolutely nothing to society. Once again with the baby in the car I was rendered violently impotent. What can I do anyway? I have five children to think about? What am I going to do? Beat the guy to a pulp? What would be the outcome of that? I would go to jail. I do not want to go to jail. Also, as all men understand...wanting to fight someone doesn't guarantee that you'll win. It may give you an advantage. Going into a fight; you never know exactly how skilled your opponent is...so...maybe this guy is an ass kicking machine? I'm sure I'll never find out...unless he does some aggregious enough to warrant an ass whoopin' ...
Furthermore, why is that women are so accomodating to everyone's feelings? I know for a fact that my wife hates this guy too but she's cordial to him. It's because she's a nice person...I just wish that she would do one of two things:
1. Tell the guy "Don't even look at me or my husband will tear your heart out!"
or
2. Completely ignore the guy.
And I guess this is how I would prefer that she deal with any asshole.  
It begs the question...are women too nice? I believe they are. I got off subject. Heh. The whole episode sent me further into depression. 
Jesus. Who cares?! Right? This is not an entertaining post. 
Crap. I gotta go clean. Do some laundry. Play with the baby. 
I should edit all these post. Christ, the first two posts sound like I aspire to be a Gen X Robert Fulghm! Is this Chicken Soup for the Emo Soul? 
Who reads this crap?
No one.

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